Cruel Summer
by BreeLady
Summary: Paul phoenix is a mere man, and as any mere man does, he falls in love with every beautful woman he meets. But this time it's different. The thing is, as a mere man, he doesn't know what to do! Paul and ?
1. The Beginning of Beautiful Cruelty

_Hey this is my first fic so any type of review would be helpful! But please don't crucify me!_

**The Beginning of Beautiful Cruelty**

Paul Phoenix was the type of man old women would faint and run away from, but as all gel haired, black bikie outfit wearing stereotypes are, he wasn't all that bad. Either way, if any normal woman saw him, they would turn and run. Fast.

Luckily, the woman he wanted was anything but normal.

Oh, how he wanted her! The lust he had, well, it bordered on obsession. The way he wanted her, didn't smoulder, and eventually die off, it grew, it burned, until all he could think of was ravishing her, and taking her to his bed.

But, now now, don't start jumping to the wrong conclusions, he didn't want to do anything on the wrong side of the law or anything, he wanted her to want him as he wanted her. Yes it was a mouthful, but that was what he wanted.

He spent nights musing about her, thinking up ways to make her smile that smile, to laugh that laugh, all the while remaining indifferent, and never revealing a thing.

It all started when he saw her in the resort café, looking noticeably absorbed by her thoughts.

He was immediately struck by her beauty (as any man with a decent amount of testosterone would) and in an act of manly arrogance, revved his motorbike, and sped down the street, showing off.

While he rode, he was looking at her out from the corner of his eye, to see if she noticed. She did, considering he veered off course and crashed into a pole. But that's beside the point.

She came running out of the café and over to him, upon seeing he wasn't injured, she helped him up, and righted his motorbike.

The dizziness cleared from his head, so he was able to focus on intently taking in what she looked like (or as some of his exes like to call it, inspecting her), his gaze wandering appreciatively up and down her 'appropriately' proportioned body.

She had smiled, a devilish, and cunning, and sweet and innocent smile, all in one.

While smiling, she leaned forward provocatively, and then with a glimmer in her eyes, she spoke in the most seductive voice, whispering the words Paul would toss and turn over for the next week.

"Hi there."

Little did he know, until she realised he was conscious, she had only wanted to steal his wallet.

_There you have it! There is more but I would like to see how this is received before I commit myself to a possible failure of a fic! Review Please! _

_Happy Days _

_BreeLady_


	2. Hardcore Boots

Thanks for the review Caligula, I appreciate it! There is too many Jin and Xiao stories! I put out a competition to everyone who reads, can you guess who the woman is? She is in the tournament! It might be a little unexpected, but hey!

Here we go, Chapter 2!

**Hardcore Boots**

He saw her numerous times around the hotel, and assumed that she was here with someone. He spoke to her many times, each time he found himself more and more enchanted with her.

It certainly gave her the upper hand in slyly learning his techniques, before he realised that she was participating in the tournament. The dainty, lithe, slender thing she was, he thought she was a spectator; ignorance is bliss, is it not.

One day he was practising in the practise arena (aptly named), and he noticed her watching. He pulled out his comb, brushed his hair up, and began showing off his best moves. He used the Hammer Of The Gods, The Boot, Shredder and after sweating through them, he was rewarded with a round of bright eyed applause from her.

He strutted out of the arena and over to her, acting cool and flexing his muscles. She put on her innocent eyes, and asked enthusiastically

" Wow! Those were some pretty hawt moves, how did you do those?"

He grinned,

"Well if you come on in, I'll show you."

An amused smile played on her lips, and Paul just had to ask,

"What's got you laughing?"

Her eyes glinted,

"I wonder if those hardcore moves come in handy anywhere else."

Paul liked the hidden suggestion in that sentence.

She joined him in the arena and he began to teach her The Boot, he had to stand close to her, as to show her the correct way of swinging the leg around. He stood behind her and positioned her body in the right beginning stance, and got distracted by the fruity scent of her hair.

He instructed her on the way to complete the move; she batted her eyelashes, and asked,

"So, when exactly do you do this move, when they are down on the ground, about to attack or what?"

Paul normally would have guarded himself against questions like this, but he was talking to probably the only woman who would ever get him to behave this much of a show-off. So he spilled.

"The trick is………."

She watched with observing eyes, and her mind mentally noted all the things he told her about his technique and storing them for future use.

For the next two hours he taught her how to fight, and she learned, well, she learned his way of fighting. At the end she asked shyly if they could have a mock fight. His smile widened,

"Alright, I promise to go easy on you."

He punched her shoulder lightly and playfully, and they prepared for a round.

She was very fragile in Paul's eyes, so the punches he threw at her were weak and non-threatening. She dodged them easily, and complained, a mocking smile on her face,

"Aww, Paul, you said you were competing in the tournament, I don't think you'll win if you behave like this!"

He grinned,

"If you think you can win, go ahead; give me your best shot."

She raised her eyebrows, and he nodded. Her leg suddenly shot out of nowhere and he found himself kissing the floor. Quite literally.

She had used The Boot on him.

If people review I will put my next 2 chapters up, please review, I really want to put them up! It gets REAL juicy!

BreeLady


	3. Jazz Nights and Small Appetites

Thanks for the reviews, and I hope I get more! (A shameless hint there) Don't worry Caligula the good stuff is coming right up!!! Terrastorm, I hope it didn't detract from the story! Here are the descriptions. The Shredder is where Paul leaps into the air, and does high-low kick. It is classified as middle, but I call it a high-low kick because one kick is quite a bit higher than the other.

Mmkay, the Boot is when he leans forward and unfolds his leg into the opponent's stomach. It is a middle region attack. The opponent will either hunch over clutching their stomach, then fall to their knees before collapsing face down. Or, they will just clutch their stomach, and not fall down.

Hammer of the Gods is where Paul whacks his opponent on top of the head, forcing them to either kneel, crumble to the floor. Strangely it is classified as middle, though I suspect it should be high.

**Jazz Nights and Small Appetites**

They next met at the hotels annual Jazz Night.

Paul put on his best (a.k.a only) tux, put extra gel in his hair, brushed his teeth _twice _(for good luck), cleaned the dirt from under his fingernails and waxed his eyebrows. Okay I'm kidding about the last one, but he did make an effort to look good.

Paul entered the room with Steve, who he found he had a natural affinity with. They both had great hair, small…………appetites and big egos.

They sat at an empty table, and began conversing.

'I think that Christie chick is hot. Man, I love her shorts. I wish she would wear them all the time, and walk right in front of me.' Steve smirked, and with his hands made the hourglass feminine figure, with the traditional whistle. Paul sniggered, and nodded his head fervently in agreement.

'Actually,' Steve retracted, 'I wish she'd wear nothing at all! Shazam!' And upon this last word he and Paul high-fived enthusiastically.

After the expected chorus of agreements and other similar comments, the doors opened, and several of the girls walked in. Steve almost drooled as Christie sauntered in, with what looked like a handkerchief as a skirt and a scarf as a halter-neck top. He gazed at her from afar, and appreciated the flimsy white material her outfit was made out of.

With Christie walked a teenage Chinese girl, who bounced energetically, and wore a kimono in a blinding shade of orange. As she spotted them, she waved and gave them a grin. Her smile was infectious, and Steve and Paul waved back. Neither Steve nor Paul could pronounce or even recall her actual name, as everyone just referred to her as Exy. She was always laughing and joking, and everyone doted on her, she was a fun spirit.

As soon as Christie was halfway into the room, she was swamped by men wanting to dance with her.

While Steve was trying to contain his excitement about Christie's clothing (and trying to figure out how he would manage to get her attention when just about every man was vying for her affections), Paul scanned the room for a certain woman he was eagerly anticipating the arrival of. He couldn't spot her. She had to be arriving soon.

Suddenly, with perfectly cliché timing, the gentle background music ceased, and there was a moments silence. In this moment, the wide stained glass centre door opened, and there was she.

She floated through the doors, ethereal and stunning. Her dress was canary yellow, not quite tight enough to suffocate, but enough make every man in the room nervously cross his legs. It was strapless, and complimented her figure. Her pale skin glinted slightly, and she had curled her hair, and paired it with red lips. She looked like a dark glamour Marilyn Monroe.

She cast a bright smile around the room, and began drifting across the room, to take a place at a table around centre. She was evidently awaiting someone to join her.

Paul took a deep breath, and winking at Steve, he waggled his eyebrows. Looking more confident than he felt, he sauntered over to her. But before he could reach her, the person she had been waiting for turned up.

'Hey cowgirl!' she called affectionately.

As soon as Paul saw her speak, he immediately pretended he had merely stood up to stretch his legs, though he had been sitting for little than 5 minutes. He sat back down, with Steve. He turned to see whom she had called.

A girl had just entered the room. Paul recognised her as the girl who used to always wear cowboy boots.

But, both Paul and Steve gaped, she certainly wasn't the girl in boots any more!

She wore a kelly-green dress, which gathered at the waist with a black material belt, and then flowed loosely from there. She looked stunning.

Steve, who gradually lifted his jaw from the ground, whispered to Paul,

' Wow, librarian turned seductress. I think I wanna get a library card.' He raised himself from his chair, pulled Paul from his, and galloped over to the centre table, where the two women were now seated.

They were giggling over something when Steve greeted them with a genius, well-educated, completely thought through,

'Hey ladies, you look so smokin' hot I think I need a cold shower.'

He turned to his librarian/seductress and bowed,

'May I have the pleasure of a dance?'

She licked her lips nervously, and nodded shyly. Steve grinned from ear to ear and led her onto the dance floor.

Which left Paul and _her_. He scrambled for something to say, and his ever trustworthy brain said,

'So, you're a girl huh? Howz that workin' out for ya?'

She giggled and replied with an elegantly raised eyebrow,

'Well, being a girl is certainly fun when you're asked to dance………'

Paul nearly swallowed his tongue.

'Uh,' he spluttered, 'Would you like to dance?'

She smiled coyly, and offered her hand,

'I think you know what I'll say.'

Well there you have it, I'm going to do a Pirates of the Caribbean, and release these chapters back to back. The next chappie should be up in a day or two! I'm having so much fun with this story!

Happy Days,

BreeLady


	4. Luurve Songs and Hot Stuff

My goodness! I feel ever so depressed! My story gets over 200 hits, and yet I only get 4 reviews, three of which from tha same person!!! Thanks heaps Caligula!!! You have my gratitude!! I warn you readers, it gets saucy!!!!

**Luurve Songs, High Temperatures and Hot Stuff**

Several couples had walked out onto the dance floor, when the Jazz Band noticed this one of the cello players motioned to someone side stage. This person ran out on stage, prepared with a microphone. He smiled into the audience,

'A nice little luurve song to start the night off eh?'

Several men audibly groaned and majority of the women swooned and whooped.

Paul turned to his dance partner, unsure whether she would still want to dance. She felt his nerves, and smiled disarmingly. Paul, comforted, took her hand, and led her onto the floor.

The Jazz singer clicked his fingers, and some guitars picked up a beat. The drummer continued the beat, while the cellos, viola and violins emitted a gentle tune. The Jazz singer, hummed for a moment, then began singing, in a surprisingly smooth voice.

'_Never know how much I love you, _

_Never know how much I care……' _

She smiled brightly, and placed her delicate hands on his shoulders. Paul swallowed nervously, and gently clasped her waist, almost at the small of her back. His heart thudded as they moved rhythmically to the music. He inhaled, and her perfume floated through his senses. She smelt like vanilla. He suddenly had intense cravings for ice cream. She smiled slightly, the corners of her red lips curving, as she adjusted one of her hands. Instead of lying on his shoulder, her cool fingers lay across the back of his neck. His neck tingled, and so did the rest of him, as he realised this adjustment moved them closer.

'_When you put your arms around me, _

_I get a fever that's so hard to bear…...' _

Her head was tilted upwards, and she was humming to the music. The drummer made a quick thump-thump, and with this sound, her hips swayed from side to side, perfectly in time with the drumming. When she rotated her hips, his hands naturally slid down to rest on them. He could feel her hips pulsing from side to side, and his heart thudded louder and faster. Suddenly, she completely changed position. She rotated so her back was to him, and she was pressed up close. One of her hands covered his at its place on her hip, and the other was slung from underneath around his neck. Her head was perched partly on his shoulder and partly on his chest. Her lips grazed his neck, and her breath lightly fanned his face. The tingling feeling intensified, and heat spread about his body.

'_You give me fever, _

_When you kiss me, _

_Fever when you hold me tight……' _

Her hips kept swaying, and he followed her rhythm. The rhythm told him to hold her close. He obeyed the rhythm. She swivelled her hips around so she faced Paul again, he kept a loose grip on her hips, and she wrapped her arms around his necks so her hands clasped behind his head. She just swayed, and leant her head on his broad chest. His whole body was heated now, and her cool hands left imprints. It caused a cold shiver to run down his back.

'_Fever. _

_In the morning, _

_Fever all through the night……'_

The Jazz singer's voice trailed off, and Paul did not want him to finish. If the song continued, he could stay here longer, and keep dancing. It felt strange, to want to dance. Dancing had never felt so good. Paul glanced down at her, her eyes were closed and she was still gently swaying. Her eyes slowly opened, and she smiled. Paul's arm slid possessively around her waist. Her lips pouted, and she traced her fingers down his jawbone. She rose to the tips of her toes, and placed a kiss on his cheek. She slid out of his arms, and whispered, with a mischievous glimmer in her eyes,

'Thanks for the dance, hot stuff.'

And then she disappeared into the crowd. She was_ gone. _

I'm sorry. I apologize for the sappiness, but I need this chapter to emphasize how Paul is simply enraptured by her. Can anyone guess who she is? I would think its obvious, but then again, I have a pretty weird imagination………..

Happy Days

BreeLady


	5. The Morning After Pill

Before you think another thought, I am not lazy; I have had exams, and have not been able to do a fun thing at all for almost three weeks! So, BreeLady is back with a vengeance!

**The Morning After Pill **

"Aww man!" Steve exclaimed, "She friggen gives you a lap dance, and you don't get any!"

Paul groaned, his head was pounding, "Well, you didn't either."

Steve cleared his throat, "I-uh……"

Paul waved Steve away, madly reaching for some Panadol, Neurofin, Aspirin, anything.

"I at least got a feel. Sort of." Paul proclaimed, rifling trough the kitchen cupboards.

Steve collapsed in a chair, watching amused as Paul ran through the hotel room, searching for some headache reliever.

"You know what Paul, you look like a girl searching for a morning after pill. Except," Steve paused, "you didn't get any!"

He then burst into laughter.

Paul, after searching maniacally through the room, had eventually found the cupboard marked 'medicine cabinet'. He hurriedly gulped a bunch of Panadols, and walked back into the lounge.

"Would you stop with the 'you didn't get any' crap! I note that you didn't get any either!" He growled, before grinning wildly and falling on the sofa.

Steve whooped, and asked eagerly,

"You said you got a feel? Of what?"

Paul rubbed his hands then leant forward, and whispered triumphantly,

"Boob and butt!"

Steve's eyes widened,

"Boob _AND _butt! Lucky bastard! All I got was a pathetic kiss!"

Paul's ego expanded as he added,

"I got one of those too."

Steve leapt up off the chair, and did a celebratory dance, complete with pelvis thrusting and really bad disco moves.

"Right on! Paul you lucky, lucky bastard!"

Paul shrugged,

"Luck had nothing to do with it."

He winked, and joined Steve's celebratory dance.

Of course, as all men do, Paul exaggerated the conquests of his previous night.

I know it was short, but there you have it, my peeps, review! Or, I will keep torturing you! With ghetto speak that is, not with my stories! Please review, do you know how hard it is for a white, teenage, female to speak ghetto? Well, it's hard! SO review!

Happy Days,

BreeLady


	6. Hachi's, HAT's and Tomatoes

_Thanks C.II! I've always had a feeling that Steve was a closet Disco dancer…… so I made him Disco-dance! _

**Hachi's, H.A.T's and Tomatoes**

All the competitors were squashed into the lobby, and Heihachi stood on a block in the centre of the room. He looked uncomfortable in a stiff suit, and he held a microphone. Tapping the microphone he spoke,

"Testing, one two three…"

The occupants of the room had to cover their ears, for the microphone had horrible feedback and distorted Heihachi's voice.

Steve turned to Paul and muttered,

"Old Hachi sounds like he's on helium."

Paul snorted and shoved his fist into his mouth. Heihachi frowned as the microphone was put back into tune. He then continued speaking.

"This year, we are having a unique way of choosing who will compete against whom." He explained, his voice loud enough without the microphone but even louder with it.

Murmurs moved around the room, with some competitors giving each other evil eyes. Heihachi shushed everyone,

"Bring out the H.A.T!"

A man in a black suit and dark glasses walked onto the block and passed a lump covered by a blanket to Heihachi.

Whispers got even louder, and Paul exchanged glances with Steve.

"What do you reckon H.A.T stands for?"

"Hairy-Assed-Tomato?" Steve quipped, and Paul elbowed him,

"How could a tomato choose who we fight?"

Steve shrugged,

"Maybe Hachi's a tomato whisperer?"

Paul sniggered, and then his eyes widened and he exclaimed,

"Sugar Honey Iced Tomatoes!"

Steve frowned,

"What?"

He then turned to look at the centre block and his jaw dropped,

"Oh. My. God."

_Well this was a very spur of the moment chapter. The next chappie will probably be up in a couple of days! _

_Happy Days_

_BreeLady_


	7. The Tomato Of Doom

_Thanks for reviewing C.II! I'm getting very angry at the lazy people that read and don't review! If you read this, you HAVE to review! _

_As requested I put the next chapter up sooner that I probably would have, but meh. For some reason I'm having this obsession with tomatoes, which I find interesting considering I can't stand them……._

**The Tomato of Doom**

Heihachi held a gigantic purple cylindrical box; Paul raised his eyebrows at the ridiculous pink polka dots adorning the box. Paul sniggered loudly, and when everyone turned curiously, he somehow managed to turn his snigger into a very loud sneeze.

Steve laughed silently, his body shaking with his amusement. Paul glared at him, but he just kept laughing.

Heihachi voice boomed through the room,

"You will choose a tomato from this box, and whatever colour your tomato is, you will go through the corresponding door."

He motioned to three doors which had been painted while no one was looking. There was a green door, a yellow door, and a red door. Steve and Paul gave each other confused looks, mouthing 'tomatoes?', and refocused their attention on Heihachi, who was reading names from a list.

"Julia Chang."

Steve winked at Paul, and as Julia hurried over to Heihachi's block, he wolf-whistled. Julia scowled at him and Steve just grinned.

She put her hand in the box and pulled out a yellow, unripe tomato. She placed the tomato in a plastic container, and began moving over to the yellow door. As she walked, Steve let out a whoop,

"Whoooo! Take it off!"

Julia turned around, her face positively glowering, and she gave him the finger in her anger,

"Why didn't you call, you jerk!?

Steve stops mid-whoop and pauses,

"Um……well-I-uh……can we have this conversation later?"

Julia shoots an accusing look at him, and slides a finger across her neck, as a sign of death, before storming into the yellow room. Steve gulped,

"I hope I'm not in the yellow room."

Paul shook his head, his glee written all over his face. People in the room were gossiping about Steve and Julia already. Heihachi tried to move the meeting along, and called out the next name,

"Lee Chaolan."

Lee sauntered over to the block, reached in the box and pulled out a ripe red tomato. Placing the tomato in the used container, he swaggered over to the red door. Before going through the door he blew a kiss into the crowd, winked, and disappeared into the red room.

Curious as to who was getting kisses from the womanising Lee, Paul craned his neck to search around the room. For a moment he could swear he saw a flash of familiar auburn hair, but after looking again, she wasn't there.

It would seem that Lee had blown a kiss to either a blond woman that he had seen around before, or a younger Japanese girl that was new to the competition, as they were giggling excitedly to each other.

Paul thought for a moment going through everyone' s last names, as it seemed that Heihachi was going in alphabetical order.

"I think you're up next." He muttered to Steve, who was growing pale at the though of facing an angry Julia.

"Baek Doo San." Heihachi called, and there was silence. Baek walked stiffly and sombrely to the block, and swiftly pulled out a green tomato. Putting the tomato down, he walked briskly to the green door. But someone called out 'Baek' and he looked over his shoulder.

The silly old man didn't stop walking, and he walked straight into the door. Rubbing his head and cursing, Baek pulled open the door and walked into the next room as people sniggered at him. Steve and Paul grinned at each other, laughing inwardly.

Steve poked Paul and pointed to Hwoarang. The young Korean looked shocked to see Baek. Paul shrugged and nudged Steve,

"Now it's you."

Steve swallowed nervously.

"Steve Fox." Heihachi called, and Steve trudged over to the box which could possibly hold the tomato of his doom.

He put his hand in the bright box, felt around for a moment, closed his eyes, and pulled out a tomato.

Breathing heavily, he opened his eyes and promptly fainted.

The tomato was yellow.

_My goodness, I've somehow gone crazier than before……… _

_Happy Days_

_BreeLady_


	8. Spontaneously Gay, Damned Vegetables

_Holy Tomatoes! Score! Boo-yah! Whoo-hooh! Other exclamations of triumph! _

_I have pulled yet another to the Paul side of the force! Lol, thanks heaps Vogue Addiction, yes, Steve is stupid, and adorable. And yes, Julia will kick his . :D Thanks, I appreciate being told my story is hilarious. It is meant to be. It would be kind of a waste to write humour and have everybody think it's Drama or something.. My goodness, I am rambling. _

_Lmao Reichsfuhrer, I like the sound of that! Can I use that random quote in a future chappie? Don't stress, more of the story is coming up soon! ___

_Last, but not least, Caligula II. This story is the Sugar Honey Iced Tomatoes (of course :D), and I'm glad you like it! _

_Sorry there was a bit of a delay on this chapter, but I've had a hectic first week back at school!_

**Spontaneously Gay, Damned Vegetables**

Paul had become so bored waiting for Heihachi to get his name, he almost envied Steve's position. But not really. He could hear screams of pain emanating from the Yellow Room, and he gulped, experiencing sympathy pains for his friend.

Name after name was called, and Paul had made up a list on a piece of paper:

**Yellow**

Julia Chang

Christie Montiero

Steve Fox

King

Jin Kazama

Jack-5

Roger Jr

**Red**

Kazuya Mishima

Bruce Irvin

Hwoarang

Craig Marduk

Marshall Law

Lee Chaolan

Bryan Fury

**Green**

Asuka Kazama

Baek Doo San

Mokujin

Ganyru

By his calculations, his name should be coming up soon.

"Paul Phoenix." Heihachi called, his voice in a monotone worse the most horrible schoolteacher. Paul felt a strange twang in his stomach, it was like being back in high school.

He trudged over to the block, the room seemingly extremely empty. He put his hand in the bucket, thinking that the odds were that he would pull out a green tomato. As his hand floated around in the bucket he grabbed his tomato, but it felt squishy. He pulled it put, and found that he had squashed his tomato in his fist.

"I think it was a red tomato?" Heihachi said, tilting his head as he observed the tomato. Paul nodded, and then his serious expression turned to one of extreme radiance, and he squealed.

"What?!" Heihachi asked, his eyes darting around the room nervously.

Paul was jumping up and down squealing very much like a girl.

"OMG! Marshy-Marsh is in the Red room! I haven't seem him in ages!"

Heihachi just stared. A few minutes later he spoke,

"Red room please, Paul."

Paul skipped off to the red room, and Heihachi shook his head sombrely, speaking under his breath to one of his suited assistants,

"Well, that was spontaneously gay."

As Paul entered the Red room, his eyes were viciously assaulted.

The room was painted fluoro red, and Paul's pupils dilated so much that he was asked by an amused competitor,

"Dude, are you stoned?"

Paul shook it off, and scanned the room for a moment, searching for 'Marshy Marsh'. He eventually found him, and bolted over to him.

"Marshy Marsh!" He squeaked excitedly, and Marshall Law looked stunned.

"Paulinater!" He shrieked, and they jumped up and down squealing, looking ridiculous.

"Haka!" They chanted, beginning a long, and intricate secret handshake, which curiously comprised large amounts of Michael Jackson style crotch-grabbing, headbutts, and belly flops.

Bryan Fury turned to Lee, who was sitting beside him, and muttered,

"Well, that was spontaneously gay."

After all the crotch-grabbing, headbutting, and belly flopping was done, Marshy Marsh and the Paulinater sat together on one of the fluoro couches.

"So what's up in this room?" Paul asked, curiously looking around the room. Law wordlessly pointed to a sign that hung in the centre of the room, it said,

"The Capsicum Room."

Paul rolled his eyes, moaning,

"Damned vegetables."

**Lol, this chapter was just for my sake more than anything…….:) **

**Next up: What's with all the vegetables? What really happened in the Yellow Room? Will these questions be answered? **

**Probably, if not next, soon. :D Please review! **

_Happy Days _

_BreeLady_


	9. Exchanging Glances

_OMG!!!! I am back!!!!!!!!! WITH A VENGANCE!!!!! YESSS!!!!!! That's what happens when your internet stuffs up. Oh god, it so good to be back, I was having fanfiction withdrawal, I was craving stories so bad!!! So, guys, thanks for the patience, and don't worry , in my internet-less time, I wrote like four more chapters of this, and they will be put up systematically. So, like, OMG, yeah. Man. _

**Exchanging Glances**

Paulinater, Marshy-Marsh and Hwoarang sat on the seat for a while, absorbed in their talking, when a loud shriek rang clearly through the walls. It was followed by a sequence of squeals and screams, each more girly than the other. Paul exchanged glances with Law, and he turned to Hwoarang, and spoke with the utmost seriousness,

"Hwoarang, I've been in the competition longer than you, but have you ever hung out with Julia? Coz I haven't and I think Steve went out with her or something, and she's real mad because he didn't ring."

A look of extreme fear crossed the usually smirking Hwoarang's face. His hands trembled so violently he spilled his orange juice all over his pants, let's just say it looked like he'd had an 'accident'. He swallowed nervously, stumbling and stuttering over words,

"She…..she….." He motioned scissors, " and ow……pain…." He motioned towards his groin, "because….."

Paul's eyes widened so hard that one popped out and he spent a few minutes trying to reinsert his eyeball. Hwoarang looked even more horrified when this happened, and Law grinned, tapping on Paul's eye,

"It's fake."

Hwoarang inched away slightly frown the dangerously deluded duo, but he still looked more horrified of the thought of Julia.

Paul gulped,

"She cut your…….erm……thingo off? Why?"

Hwoarang swallowed,

"I went out with her, and I didn't call…….."

Law fainted with horror, and they spent the next couple of minutes trying to revive him.

After Law was successfully revived, Paul turned to Hwoarang,

"Steve went out with her a couple of days ago, and he hasn't called her. Before we were sorted into rooms, he went to talk to her, and she was really angry with him….do you think right now she might be-" Paul was interrupted, as with perfect timing, an ear-splitting squeal came from the direction of the Yellow Room.

"OMG!" Yelled Law, only just realising something, "That's why it looks as if you've got no balls!"

Hwoarang looks extremely embarrassed and mumbles quietly, "I have to use socks….."

Paul and Law explode with laughter, when Paul turns to Law with a quizzical look on his face,

"Did you just say OMG? As in, the letters, O M G? Heh. I never knew you spoke in IM?"

Law looked extremely impressed with himself.

"Well, I've been practicing."

Paul stifled a snigger, and then asked,

"How come you noticed that Hwoarang had an exceptionally small package?"

Law turned bright red and stuttered,

"Uh…..aren't we shying away from the original subject? I think we need to help Steve."

Paul and Hwoarang exchanged glances.

Paul ran over to one of the security guards,

"Is there any way we can just pop into the yellow room to check on a friend, there's a psycho girl determined to deprive him of his manhood!?!!!"

The security guard just raised his eyebrows, and shook his head.

"What do you think is happening to him?" Paul asked, looking worried about his friend's manhood.

Hwoarang shrugged,

"Probably something painful. Julia's into kinky stuff."

Paul and Law exchanged glances, looking very interested, but a loud booming voice ran across the Red Room, alternatively known as the capsicum room.

"People of the Red Room, now is the time to choose your first match!"

Paul, Hwoarang and Law all crossed their fingers that they wouldn't have to fight each other, but all secretly hoping that they would fight and win.

"What's going to happen," Boomed the voice, "Everybody is going to find a partner, quickly. Now."

All around the room people scattered and grabbed their friend's hands. Marshy-Marsh and Paulinater immediately shotgunned being partners, and Hwoarang looked a little forlorn, but he got over it.

The tall, lithe blonde lady attempted to get to Lee, but he and Bryan had already partnered up. Hwoarang went over to Craig, and they decided to be partners, and Kazuya and Bruce gave each other high-fives.

"Nina!" Lei called out, and the tall blonde lady turned around. A small thankful smile appeared on her face, and she partnered up with him.

The big security guard surveyed the room,

"Everybody got a partner?"

A chorus of 'yes' 'yea' 'yeah' echoed around the room.

"Alright then. Then that's who your first battle will be against."

"Say wha!!!?!!!?" Exclaimed Lei, with Nina sitting smugly by his side.

Kazuya and Bruce exchanged glances.

"AhhahhahahahhahahehhehehehehehahahhahHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH!" A disturbing, creepy and sinister trail of laughter came from the corner of the room, where Bryan was sitting, with a malicious look on his face. Lee just gulped.

Hwoarang and Craig exchanged glances.

"WOULD YOU STOP WITH THE EXCHANGING GLANCES THING!" Law bellowed, and Paul just scuffed his feet on the ground.

"Ah shit." He muttered.

**Oh, it feel so damn good to be back!! Please review, and all that jazz! **

**Oh, and I discovered something really funny the other day, actually a couple of weeks ago, when I was still in a tomato faze, that if I inserted Tomato at the end of my name, I get BLT. **

**BreeLadyTomato. **

**BLT. **

**Oh god I'm hilarious:) **

**Peace out,**

**BLT **

**BreeLady**


	10. Man

_Alright, this is a mega short interlude, just to connect the chapters together. It ain't much, but I've got four more chapters ready to put up, so, I might even post the next this day aswell :) YAY!!! People like my story!!!!! Mine & Mine Alone, thanks heaps for your newfound support for my story:) Smiles all around! _

_CaligulaTomato II, thanks for the hug! I love hugs! My friends think I'm positively yako for hugging people so much. I have been known to hug randoms…… _

_Oh and BTW (hehehe IM) yako is like a slang word for wacky. I dunno where it came from, people just started using it…..? Oh and Vogue :) thanks heaps, I like your use of IM… :) Be careful of your addiction to vogue! Would that make you a vogueaholic? Or would that be a vogaholic? I don't know……_

**Man.**

Marshy-Marsh and Paulinater just stared at each other. They knew there was no way they could not fight, but what on earth could they do?

They had to fight.

They had to.

Paul struggled for words,

"Ah hell man, what are we gonna do?"

Law shrugged looking perplexed,

"Yea man, we're totally disadvantaged coz we've trained together."

Paul swallowed nervously, and with a pained expression he attempted a smile,

"I guess we'll just have to fight, man."

Law pondered this for a while, before throwing his hand in the air with a grin,

"Alright man, up high!"

They high-fived and went of into separate areas of the Red Room. AS they walked apart, Paul turned and yelled,

"Good Luck man!"

Law nodded,

"You too man."

And so they went their separate ways. Man.

**Wow. That was shorter than I expected. Ah well, the continuing chapter will probably be up later today! I don't expect you to give a review for this tiny little thing, but if you have a chance……… :) **

**Smiles,**

**BreeLadyTomato **

**Or as I am more commonly known,**

**BreeLady**


	11. Enter the Oblong

_Yeah, yeah, I know it was too short. I readily acknowledge that, it was quite pathetic, but I needed that little chapter to be separate. If I included it with this chapter it would have been a little disjointed. Too short chapters aside, don't worry, the next chapter is of a suitable length:) _

_I didn't expect any reviews, I really, really didn't, so thank you! _

_El-oh-el._

_Yeah. _

_Hugs:) _

**Paulinater: Enter the Oblong**

_What am I going to do? _Paul wondered _I wanna win, but, do I really want to beat Marshy-Marsh to a pulp? Money or friendship?_

After a moment of thought, the answer was evident.

Paul cracked his knuckles in preparation.

He _really_ wanted that money.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It seemed that there was some sort of makeshift ring, created by arranging the couches is a sort of oblong shape. Paul grunted his acknowledgement at Law, who had just entered the ring, well, entered the Oblong.

They smiled woefully at each other, and in an age old tradition, began a long series of body-cracking. After every bone was successfully cracked, they took their customary positions at each side of the…oblong.

"Ready?" A voice blasted, and everyone groaned as a man in a black suit sat in a lifeguard tower bellowing into a megaphone.

Paul took a deep breath, and bent his knees, balled his hands into fists and tensed his body up.

"FIGHT!" The voice screeched.

Law squealed, enraged,

"HEY! I'm not ready yet!"

Someone in the crowd booed,

"Get over it you ponce!"

Law pouted, put his hands on his hips and harrumphed,

"STFU!"

"OOOOO!" The voice teased, and Law fired up.

"That's it! AARRGHH! Let's fight!" He roared and threw himself into the centre of the oblong. Paul shrugged and sauntered in, preparing to blast a punch, when Law did one of those freaky backflip things and clonked him in the chin.

"Yeah!" Law crowed "You got pawned!"

Paul frowned in confusion,

"Don't you mean pwned?"

Law swallowed and his eyes darted from side to side,

"Uhh, yeah."

Paul rolled his shoulders and prepared to blast in for another attack. He blasted his fist into Law's stomach, and a great big 'oof' escaped his mouth.

"Oy." Law gasped, "You knocked the wind out of me."

Paul's face turned into a look of disgust, and he desperately waved in front of his face,

"I certainly did."

He covered his nose with one hand, and tried to flick his heel into Law's side. Law flipped to the side, and it clipped him, and rebounded off. Paul's knee came flying back at him, and he kneed his own chin.

"Aw ffffffff-udge!" He spluttered, and motioned to the suit in the lifeguard tower, "Time out!!!!"

He walked to the edge of the oblong, and wheezed to his backers,

"Where's my mouthguard??"

There was some fumbling, and his bright green mouthguard was tossed to him. He slotted it into his mouth, chewed at it a bit, and re-entered the oblong, with a thankyou wave at the audience.

As he prepared to get back into the fight, he could taste a really nice taste on the mouthguard.

_I love the flavoured ones! I _He thought, and rolled his shoulders, ready to fight again.

He and Law circled each other for a while, and Law gave one of those ear-splitting Indian war cries,

"AIYIYIYIYIYIYI!!!!"

He then rushed forward, leapt into the air with a foot extended before him. Paul smirked, and knocked aside Law's foot with ease.

He then barrel-rolled into Law, tackling him to the ground. Law grunted and gouged at Paul's hairline.

"Ow! Why do you have such long fingernails?"

Law grinned, "All the better to scratch you with!"

Paul recoiled, scrambling off of Law, and circled him warily. The taste on his mouthguard was getting distracting, he couldn't place the taste. It was familiar, but he mustn't have had it in a while.

Law jumped into Paul's path and with a vicious twist, he used his hip to made Paul's knee crumple to the ground.

"I'm sorry, but I really need that money!" Law whispered before digging his heel into Paul's back.

Paul exerted a grunt, and pulled himself to his feet, his stomach was growling, and he had a strange feeling. Suddenly he placed the taste.

His mouthguard was laced with cheese! He hadn't chased it in years. And there was a good reason for that.

He was severely lactose intolerant.

**Hee Hee! Was that better:) Can't wait til the next chapter!**

**Please review! **

**The Tomato Lady,**

**Breelady**


	12. Tequila With a Whole Lotta Ping

_Whoa. It's been a very long time. I'm sorry everyone, if anyone was anxiously awaiting the next chapter, that it has taken this long. I apologise, and I offer you many, many cookies to ease your pain.:) _

_Yea! The BreeLady is back. Slightly more mature, but my writing certainly won't reflect that. _

_I had a lot of issues with my beloved computer, and in the end, I had to get a new one, as the other was going to cost waaay to much to repair. _

_So, on a newer computer (one that works much better), the BreeLady has some new fodder for readers to devour. _

_Enjoy! _

**Tequila, Face Sucking and a Whole Lotta Ping.**

Paul gasped, gripping his stomach tightly. He sank to his knees, and began groaning painfully. Law strutted around the oblong, puffing his chest out, thinking that Paul had succumbed to his 'superior power'.

'I won!! WOOT!' He cawed, and an anonymous voice squawked back,

'It's w00t! You idiot!'

This prompted an argument in some of the spectators,

'It's wo0t!'

"No, it's w00t!'

Law cocked his head to the side. _(A/N damn I love the English language for having such a simple word with dirty connotations)_ He blinked several times, and then, looking back at Paul doubled over in pain he went over to make sure that he didn't need serious medical help. He sauntered over, winking and waving at people, and then knelt beside Paul.

'What's wrong? Do you need a doctor?' He whispered out of the corner of his mouth, at the same time checking out the only woman in the audience.

'I need….I need….' Paul moaned, his pain increasing.

Law frowned, and swiftly rolled Paul onto his back. He listened to Paul's stomach, which was whirring ferociously.

'Do you need some sort of medicine? Are you ill?'

Paul nodded,

'I'm……… lactose intolerant. Mouthguard……… laced…………………'

'How do you treat it?' Law asked, worry lines creasing his face.

'I need……..I need…..'

'Yes……..?'

'I need a toilet…….'

Law's face froze.

'Doctor!' he called 'Some body get this man to a bathroom, quickly!'

Medical officials came running over, and Paul was swiftly carried to a bathroom were he could….relieve himself of the pain.

Law found himself talking to the match official.

'He said that his mouthguard was laced with something containing lactose. As soon a lactose goes through his system- well, let's just say that he's gonna be in that toiled for a while.'

The official frowned writing swiftly on a clipboard,

'So, only someone who knew about his condition could have done this….'

'Yeah,' Law nodded, 'Only me and his doctor know, really. Most people think he just doesn't like cheese or Milo's.'

'Only you and his doctor. Really.' The official pondered, 'Arnold.'

A giant muscle man came trotting over with a megaphone.

Law stood patiently to his side, awaiting him to make an announcement regarding Paul's sabotage.

'Ahem. We have an alarming announcement to make. Paul Phoenix's chances in the competition were sabotaged. By this man, Marshall Law.'

Law looked shocked, and gurgled pathetically as Arnold clasped his painfully by the shoulders.

'Because of the depravity of such a deed, Marshall Law has forfeit the competition. Paul Phoenix has won this match by forfeit.'

'**NOOOOO! I mean……WOOHOO! Bleagh….WOOHOO!'** Paul shrieked from the bathroom.

'Somebody get that man some air freshener.' Lee catcalled from the back of the room.

Six hours later, when Paul returned from the bathroom, his insides successfully detoxed, he was amazed to find the room completely changed.

The room had previously been a place of suspicion and rivalry, with particular groups sticking together. Admittedly, there were quite a few people gone from previously, but the room seemed more relaxed. Incredibly more so. The blonde lady, Nina, was currently nibbling on Lei's ear. Now, if that wasn't a sign of alcohol, Paul didn't know what was.

He walked over to where everybody was gathered, and was startled to find that they were all inspecting a computer, inset into a desktop.

'What's up guys.' He asked, curious as to what was going on.

'Oh hey Paul.' Nina said, disconnecting herself from Lei, 'Two things. Tequila, and results.'

'Oh, are we gonna find out the competitors for the next round?'

She nodded briskly, and pointed emphatically to various bottles and cups on a nearby table. 'Tequila.' She promptly smiled sluggishly, and began sucking face with Lei.

Paul recoiled a bit, and decided to check out the results first. He moved closer to the table, and found himself chatting to Hwoarang.

'Hey, weren't those two meant to have fought each other?' He asked, pointing to the two lovebirds he had just passed.

'Oh, Kazuya and Bruce knocked each other out, and they just said that Lei and Nina could both continue, as to replace the unconscious.'

Paul comprehended, and nodded, 'Oh, what about the results?'

'They're coming up at about 9, they said. So it should be up any minute.'

Paul nodded. He stood there awkwardly with Hwoarang as they stared at the desk, waiting for something to happen.

………………

……………

…………

………

……

…

PING!

'Results are up guys!' Hwoarang called out, and everyone sidled over, anxiously checking the results.

Paul pulled out his notebook carefully, aware that anyone at any moment could discover he had flowers on the cover.

He carefully inspected the results and copied them down.

**Yellow**

Julia Chang **DEFEATED **Ling Xiaoyu

Christie Montiero **DEFEATED **Roger Jr

Steve Fox **DEFEATED **King

Raven **DEFEATED **Feng Wei

Jin Kazama **DEFEATED **Jack-5

**Red**

Kazuya Mishima **DOUBLE KNOCKOUT **Bruce Irvin

Hwoarang ** DEFEATED **Craig Marduk

Paul Phoenix **DEFEATED VIA FORFEIT **Marshall Law

Bryan Fury **DEFEATED** Lee Chaolan

Lei Wulong **DRAW **Nina Williams

**Green**

Anna Williams **DEFEATED **Yoshimitsu

Asuka Kazama **DEFEATED **Wang

Baek Doo San **DOUBLE KNOCKOUT **Mokujin

Heihachi **DRAW **Ganyru

Everyone studied the results for several long minutes. They studied them, and everyone came to the conclusion that this was going to be one hell of a competition.

'**WHO WANTS TEQUILA?' **

'_WOOHOO! Tequila party!'_

**Ohhh, yeeaaahhhh! Shiny Disco Ball!**

**What are the bets that everyone is gonna get drunk and wasted? **

**With fond thoughts,**

**BreeLady**


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